I wish I could say that Darwin has adjusted with flying colors his first week of school. But it’s been tough. Not in an obvious sort of way. But woven throughout the day with different, but nonetheless strong indicators of a child who is overwhelmed.
Like meal time. When he says he doesn’t like what’s on his plate. Refuses to eat it. Gets up from the table to go play with his cars. Instead of enthusiastically wanting to say grace, while shoveling big spoonfuls of whatever I made into his mouth. Or bedtime. Usually asleep after the second or third book. Drifting off peacefully in my arms. Body tense and agitated. Finding any excuse to get out of bed. Eyes open and staring blankly into space after the final page is turned. I can feel him thinking. I gently rub his back. But it’s a process.
One that he’s figuring out as best he can.
Which pretty much looks like a lot more sass. Needy as fuck. Super sensitive and ready to pop off or burst into tears over the littlest things. His tone of voice stuck in a permanent whine. And through it all, I’ve tried my best to remain calm. Constantly telling myself that this to shall pass. Especially once we can get his earlier bedtime in order to match the earlier wake up time. Big bags and tiny wrinkles underneath tired eyes.
I’m sleepy, he says.
While his restless mind fights to stay awake.
And I think back to just a few weeks ago. Summer break. Lazy mornings when time didn’t matter in the least. When we could spend as much time snuggling together before breakfast. No agenda. And the ease of it all.
Making this last week feel like an eternity of emotional hell for someone who is 31 weeks pregnant and getting asked if she’s having twins on a regular basis.
We even called out an SOS to our nanny last night.
Can you come watch Darwin – now?
She did. And relayed his increased tension. Suggesting a relaxing tea for him before bed.
With tomorrow kicking off Week 2, I am already exhausted. Because while he always comes home with a smile on his face. And has even started sharing stories of his new friends with excitement. I know that this week will be yet another adjustment. Away from me, who he’s been hanging with all summer. And from his old guardaria. Safe and familiar. Us all looking towards a time in the future when this somewhat intimidating new routine at Pachamama becomes the norm. Not preoccupying thoughts at night. Nervous energy releasing itself in the comfort of his own home that can’t be expressed elsewhere during the day.
Hello Monday, we’re ready for you.